neowiccan (neowiccan) wrote,

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i know lughnasadh is a fire sabbat, dedicated to the celtic sun god lugh. but as the festival of first harvest, it always feels demetrian to me. and it's the most bittersweet of all of them.
it's usually hot at the beginning of august, with few hints that autumn is on its way in. but the hints are there. yellow leaves up and down the lane, and quivering on the river birch. the days are noticeably shorter now. still long, still plenty of time to putter around after dinner and still finish up the dishes before dusk, but fireflies are now few and far between.
yesterday my hummingbirds were mobbing the feeder. i was horrified. it's still summer! WAY too soon for them to leave me!
the grass is dry and yellow and prickly. hard on the feets.
the mares are droopy when i bring them in for breakfast. there are audible sighs of relief when i turn off the lights and turn on their fans.
i'm twitchy and out of sorts. it's hot and glorious, but i'm not sinking into it the way i want to. the knowledge that classes start next month is always at the back of my brain, nagging me to work on my syllabi, scolding me for not having lost the weight i hoped to this summer, reminding me of what i haven't accomplished. i know what i need to do, i'm just too pissy and distracted to do it.
so i leave my offerings of bread and milk, and one of the few tomatoes i rescued from the stink bugs in the garden. i pray to Demeter, and to Apollon and Lugh. and try to find my way back into the moment, the golden sweet present.
and i thought age would bring wisdom!
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